They Save Us. Who Saves Them?

( this first part of this post was written on August 18th after an episode of Rescue Me. )

Every Wednesday, I try to watch Rescue Me. If you havent see it, its a show (fitictious) about the FDNY and their day to day lives working as firefighters. Now this show has been on tv for 7 seasons and I have tried to watch them all and sometimes, it was hard to watch the episodes due to the raw content, and not because there were scenes of death and bad injury but because my father is a firefighter. He has been a firefighter, Captain, Battalion Chief my whole life. He loves what he does but he rarely tells what exactly he does. Yes he would come home from his 24 hour shift, saying the funny stories from the previous shift and if he went on a run for careless cooking or someones cat was stuck in a tree but he never really told me, maybe he told my mom, the real stuff he did- running into the building first to search for surviors or other things that he didnt want to worry me with. The point is,  I never really knew what he really did.
I never fully understood what the job of a firefighter was until Rescue Me came out. This show is raw, and unforgiving and gave me an insight of what firefighters actually do. Maybe its dramatized for tv or blown out of proportion but it gave me something to see and say, oh thats what my dad does for a living.
When I was little, I remember when my dad came home, my mom and my dad would sit in the kitchen, drinking their coffee and talking about the past shift. As I got older, I sat with them sans coffee and listened. He ususally gave me the watered down version and when I got bored listening to every (boring) detail about his day, I left and then he would give my mom the real story- what really happened at 432 Smith Street or who had to go to the hospital after receiving attention at the ReHab tent at that 4 alarm last night. I got smarter and decided to listen sometimes to the stories from the hallway. Not until a couple of years ago, when I was away at college, I really started to realize the danger firefighters put themselves into.

The point of all this rambling- Last nights episode really hit me hard. Rescue Me is having their series finale on September 7th and fitting its right before the 10th Anniversey of September 11.  The Chief spoke about how heroes arent remember by making walls and monmouments (which I think is a good way of remembering heroes) but they are remembered by speaking about them, telling their stories of heroism and why they left such a lasting impression on you. The Chief spoke about the Vietnam War and how he recieved a letter from the wife of one his men that served under him. Then the Chief spoke about what those firefighters were thinking on the morning of September 11 right before they rushed downtown to do what they were trained to do-save the public. What were those brave and fearless firefighters thinking, writing letters to their loved ones that in the back of their minds they knew they would never see again?

Today is September 11th, and I still think what were those people thinking when they were calling their loved ones to say their last goodbye? What was going through their minds?  Watching the documentries and other tv programs about September 11th is like reliving that day over and over again. The huge question that looms over everyones head is "Where were you on Septemeber 11, 2001?" Everyone remember exactly where they were, who they were with and what they saw.
I was in Ms. Stankovich's 8th Grade Science Class. I was sitting at the lab table inbetween Jacob Stueber and Erin Stewart. It was right after gym class for me and someone ran into the class room and told Ms. Stankovich to put the tv on, something had happened. As she turned the TV on, we saw flames and smoke pouring out of one of the World Trade Towers. I didnt believe it, I didnt understand it then the whole class witnessed something that looked to be out of a horror movie- We saw the second plane fly right into the other Tower. I was 13 at the time and at that moment my world closed in and I remember thinking what is next?! Erin Stewart saw I was upset and said to me" why are you so worried? We are so far away from there, nothing will happen." I knew something would happen but I hoped it didnt.
When I arrived home later that day, I didnt see my dad's car in the usual spot in the drive way. My worst fear came true. My father, a Fire Captain, was in Northern NJ waiting to be deployed to help with the rescue detail at Ground Zero. My mom didnt even have to say it, I knew he was in North Jersey. I think I talked to him later that night; I was trying to be brave and strong but inside I was so worried. I don't remember exactly how long my father was gone for but I do remember him coming home. He looked like a ghost, still covered in grey dust, with a look on his face that was like no other I had ever seen. He didnt talk about what he did nor did he want to. I was happy to have him home, safe and sound.
Not till years later, has the effect of September 11th really hit me. The internet has let me have my hands on thousands of videos, personal stories, offical reports and millions of photos. The photos most of them are burned into my memory because I saw them live, and uncut. Still they all  bring tears to my eyes looking at them. One of the hardest hitting images that I cannot seem to fully understand is a video clip (recently I saw it in 102 minutes that changed America) that you see the smoke from the collpase of one of the towers and you see a fire truck, filled with firefighters speeding into the unknown and you see them dissappear into the dust and smoke and you know that they were probably never seen again.
After watching a documentary entitled "9/11", it gave me a chilling look into the lives of firefighters who were practically the first responders to the scene. They filmed when the first tower fell and what happend afterwards and it was unconcievable that these firefighters were still living. It was an inspring look into the lives of firefighter and how they are trained to do exactly what they did on September 11th- rescue people.That is what firefighters do. That is their lively hood.

America is resilient, strong and proud. We got through this and we can get through anything else.

(Summer) Snow Day

  Last night, my parents and I went to the NKOTBSB Concert in Atlantic City.
Before we got into the concert, we went out to dinner at 24 Central in Trump. Since we ate there before ( before the Michael Buble Concert), I decided to bring my own dinner (due to the fact that it wasn't a gluten free establishment and I was too afraid to try something-even salad- due to cross contamination with other gluten foods. ) My parents and I asked for a booth and they stuck us in a corner which made me feel a little better because I felt awkward bringing my own food to a restaurant. I 'ordered' a salad and a water. My parents ordered grill cheese and a burger. I kept the salad in front of me and put my fork on the side of the dish as if I was eating it. My parents ate it and I ate a gluten free ham sandwich which I kept on my lap. Luckily our waiter wasn't very attentive and I didn't have to explain to the waiter why I was eating my sandwich.
After dinner, I went to Starbucks and got myself a treat- An organic apple juice juice box. HAHA I felt five.

After dinner it was close to 6:30, we decided to get online to wait for the concert. Luckily it wasn't raining, unlike the last time we were here for Michael Buble but it was extremely humid and hot out. After waiting for about 20 minutes, we were finally able to get in. We made a beeline for the concert merchandise and I got a teal Backstreet Boys t-shirt ( which later I ended up wearing!)

 Boy oh boy, did those boys grow up! I will admit, I am a bigger Backstreet Boys fan than New Kids on The Block but in the recent years I have liked them. What a wonderful high energy concert that lasted for 2 and 1/2 hours!! My mom was dancing and fist pumping and my dad even had fun. It was a great example to see how fans follow musical groups as they grew up. The audience was a mix of 20 something year olds to middle age to the older generation. Everyone was up on their feet singing along and having the best time. The opening acts were Matthew Morrison ( Yes, Mr. Shuster from Glee)and Midnight Red. Matthew Morrison was amazing- He is a dynamic performer!  My parents was very impressed! Midnight Red was cute. They are like a new school of boy bands- They had the cute one, the wild one, the young one, the old one and the shy one. I liked it.

Overall it was a wonderful night out.

I was exhausted, to say the least and I had to get up this morning for work. After being jolted out of bed by my alarm clock, I started getting ready, jumping in the shower etc. After my shower, my mom surprised me by making me my egg whites with ham and pepperoni and potatoes and onions (all gluten free! ), I went to my room and checked my phone and I saw I had a missed call and a voice mail. To my surprise, it was the store manager telling me that I didn't have to come into work because (get this!) our store was flooded and is closed today! What a nice surprise!
I was grateful for my snow day and I have been very very productive! ( and I believe I still get paid for the hours I would have worked because the store was closed for an unseen reason!!!!)

Other than work and the NKOTBSB concert, life has been quiet, which is what I like and relaxing.


Off to watch the Cops Marathon on G4!

"Jersey has the most beautiful women in the world." -Howie Dorough from last night.

-elle

you only see these things working in retail...

So the other day, I was one of the cashiers and I look up at the line that had quickly formed and I see a mother and son. The mother has some beauty product and the son was looking down at what looked like was a portable game. I then realized it was a cellphone and he was looking so intently at it,  I wondered what he was playing. Then his mother says to the boy " great job! You did it" at this point I was still clueless what he was playing. A girl, in her twenties, was waiting behind the boy and the mother and her boyfriend was looking down at his iPhone so intently just like the son was. I didnt think anything of it and the mother said something to the son about angry birds, and the boyfriend behind him, piped up and said "oh im playing that too". After saying that  he quickly got back to his game. This whole conversation made me giggle and made me wish I had a camera because it was just like a kodak moment to see a young boy and a grown up playing angry birds so intently.

Also, Im trying to think of a way to make some cash on the side of working retail and hopefully my full time job in the fall. I want something that i can make my own hours and do something that is worthwhile and people would pay for.

So goodnight moon,
And goodnight you,
When you're all that I think about.
All that I dream about.
How'd I ever breathe without...

-elle

You're Approved

I have been waiting to hear these two words since I turned 18 and it finally happened tonight. I was approved for my very first credit card. This is such a momentous occasion. I recieved yet another credit card application today in the mail and i sat at my desk after dinner staring at it intently and I decided to give it a go.I entered the information and then clicked continue. The very next screen came up and it said APPROVED in huge bold letters. I called my mom in to make sure I was seeing it correctly and I was! I beyond excited.

I just had to share that with you all.

-elle

we're growing up

Last night I got to spend some time with a good friend Emily. She recently (as in Tuesday) got her tonsils out. We spent a couple hours catching up on what has happened with us within the past month, what we are up to now and how she is preparing to spend the next two years in London, England. She is completing her Masters there. It was nice to get some perspective on my crazy life from her. We have known each other since my Sophomore year of High School.

Yesterday I also rented the Lincoln Lawyer at Redbox and I ended up watching it this morning. It was a wonderful legal thriller with a ton of twists. Plus who doesn't love a Matthew McConaughey movie?!

Beach tomorrow and life is going good!

And you know what?  When you least expect it, something great might come along, something better than you ever planned for.

-elle

Its my (1/2) Birthday...

Golly, Its already been six months since my birthday. I decided to do a half year update.

January: My birthday (sadly no photos)

            

A ton of Interviews for Internships

February: Started my Internship

March: St. Patricks Day

April: Bought a Bed!

May:

Fundraiser for a local firefighter who was severely burned and hurt at a fire.

click here  for the story.

I got my Iphone.

I met  Megan McCafferty (again)

I graduated college

I went to Disney World.

 I started my accounting class

I supported the country and our veterans for Memorial Day.

Georgie met Jill Nicolini from Chanel 11 News on the Beach.

June:

Went to the Michael Buble Concert

 Got an A in my Accounting Class

July:

 Went to Fireworks on the Board walk

It has been such a great half of year. I am hoping that the next 6 months are as fun!

-elle

oh my gosh, these fireworks are AWESOME

that was said by a little boy tonight on the boardwalk while watching the fireworks. My parents and I went to the board walk tonight for the free fireworks. The boardwalk was fun, I went on the swings and on the carosel. I'm not much of a ride person. We played some skee ball and won some points. I have been collecting them since '95. I'm up to like 9000 and the only thing I can buy is a plastic whistle. hahaa I'll cash them in one day.

The rest of the day was nice, my new iPhone case came in the mail today. Its a penguin and its awfully cute.

I finally decided on a major for my bachelors degree. After a long thought process, I narrowed it down to 3 majors:
1. Education ( Mathematics)
2. Marketing/PR/Advertising
3. Accounting

Diversity was the key in my thinking. I already have an Associates Degree in Paralegal Studies and I really do like it ALOT but I cant get a Bachelor's degree in it unless I want to do an online degree, which I don't.
Here was my thought process for choosing these majors:
1. I always wanted to become a teacher. I toyed around with this thought all the way back in 2009 right before I started the paralegal program @ BCC. Though I thought I would want to teach elementary school but I don't- I want to teach math. That last statement made me laugh because from 1st grade all the way to 12th grade I had a tutor in math. (yes I know 1st grade math is 1+1. I was that bad in math.) Then my very first semester in college, I was placed in Calculus and I ended up passing the class with a B+ without a tutor. I did it all by myself. I felt awesome. I feel as if I can give back and help kids understand math like I did with the help of a tutor. Also I can work September to June in a School setting then June to September I can work as a paralegal so then I have 2 incomes coming in. BUT New Jersey seems to have an influx of teachers and there seems to be very few jobs for teachers. Not to mention the pension reform is still up in the air so that didn't seem to be a good idea right now.

2. I have always been a creative person (not as much the past couple of years but I am) and my mom has always told me that I would be great in Marketing/PR/Graphic Design. While I did take 2 Graphic Design classes, I realized that Graphic Design wasn't my forte but Marketing was still in my mind. For me, I feel as if I finally settled in here, where I live. I like the area, I am close to the beach, NYC and Philly. I am a homebody and I have finally realized. For me to make a decent living as a Marketing/PR/Advertising Representative, I would have to go north to the NYC area or West to the Philly Area. For me to commute either way would be A. very expensive and B. very tiresome (for me)
This didn't seem like a good idea.

3. If you told me 5 years ago, I would be considering becoming an Accounting major, I would have laughed so hard at you. Flashfoward to today, I am actually considering it. It combines what I like- numbers and math (but it all has to equal which is like a self check), being creative (naming the different accounts) and its recession proof. Who doesn't need an accountant?! After taking the Fundamentals of Accounting class a month ago, I realized with the right teacher I can learn and even love accounting. Now let me tell you- Accounting and I had a pretty tumultuous relationship. I used to cry during every class because I had no idea what was going on in this class. I got through it with a B the first time but in Accounting 2 oh gosh, I bawled my eyes out every morning at 8 am because the professor used to call on me every time because the professor liked to call on the student who got the lowest test score on first every since class; guess who that lucky student is- ME! Needless to say, I got my first D ever on my transcript. After I saw that, I was done with Accounting FOREVER. I took Accounting 1 again 4 years later at a community college and I did decent but I still didn't fully understand it. A year passed by and I decided to take Fundamentals of Accounting and I fell in love. I loved this so much that the professor even noticed and decided to point out to me (in front of the whole class) that I should be an Accounting major. I laughed it off but after I really started to think about it and I was intrigued and I started to investigate the major.
After a long time of research and weighing the pros and cons, I decided to go into Accounting. Since I am considered a Transfer student so I need to contact the transfer counselors and see where I can get the most bang from my buck.(ie Where the most of my credits to accepted, the lowest price etc. )

This is a big decision for me. I don't really like big decsisons and I finally realize that this is what I want to do. I am still interested in Paralegal and Legal Studies. I talked to my parents about it and they are so happy for me. Its been a rocky 5 years for me but I am happy to be back on track.
Also I will be paying for my Accounting degree (possibly MBA) all by myself. This is a choice made by me. My parents of course offered but I want to invest my hard earned money on myself. I have some savings bonds that I will probably use to help me along.

Along with these classes I hopefully will be working at the courthouse full time. I realized its not a rush for me to get my degree, I have to just take it one step at a time.
-elle